your horoscope

Discussion in 'Space Junk' started by ijffdrie, Feb 18, 2011.

your horoscope

Discussion in 'Space Junk' started by ijffdrie, Feb 18, 2011.

  1. ijffdrie

    ijffdrie Lord of Spam

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    I vill gaze into me crystal ball, and from eet, I vill show you your future!


    Aries: today, you will read a horoscope
    Taurus: You will be reminded by a seventeen year old kid that drunk people see pink elephants
    Gemini: a website will inform you that the sequel to wings of liberty is heart of the void
    Cancer: you just went: "wait, what?"
    Leo: Every sunrise will bring with it a new dawn.
    Virgo: You will have rejoiced after meeting a dark man.
    Libra: You are aware of more than you realize
    Scorpio: At one point, you will consider buying heart of the swarm
    Sagittarius: You will gaze upon the stars
    Capricorn: You will notice capricorn sounds like acorn
    Aquarius: You will taste the fresh water of civilization and see the end of a day
    Pisces: You realize that you are a human, and before you is the future.
     
  2. kuvasz

    kuvasz Corrections Officer

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    I don't like mine.
     
  3. EatMeReturns

    EatMeReturns Happy Mapper Moderator

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    Hey kuvasz... What's your sign? ;D
     
  4. MarineCorp

    MarineCorp New Member

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    Riiight...mine seems to be quite accurate.
     
  5. Makki

    Makki Member

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    OH YEAH im human, YES!!!!!!!
    and my future is before me? o_O
    that doesn't sound good.... i guess ill have to live backwards then... NO!!!
    I'll never go back to my boring past again ._.
     
  6. Stirlitz

    Stirlitz Member

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  7. Fenix

    Fenix Moderator

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    Aries
    Your fear of change means that spending the next few centuries in a block of ice will be extremely soothing, at least until the New Reformed Xalfraxian Alliance thaws you out.

    Taurus
    You'll never again hear a negative word spoken of you, thanks to your sweet nature and an unfortunate incident with a pair of explosive earbuds.

    Gemini
    It's unclear whether you're going to murder ice cream men or become an ice cream man and murder people, but the stars are pretty certain you're going to be known as the Ice Cream Man Murderer.

    Cancer
    You've never asked anybody for anything in your life, which may be why those expectant waiters have been following you around for years.

    Leo
    You'll become a victim of boredom in the workplace when the technicians figure out a way to make your x-rays a lot more interesting.

    Virgo
    Although roughly 70 percent of the earth's surface is covered by water, that still doesn't explain why you have to be rescued from drowning all the time.

    Libra
    You don't know why people are so freaked out by your collection of bloody children's underwear. After all, it says Museum of Bloody Children's Underwear right on the hand-painted sign on your house.

    Scorpio
    This would be a bad week to leave your mansion, seeing as how you've betrayed about half of the people of Wisconsin.

    Sagittarius
    True love will careen into your life without warning next week, spin you around, take your breath away, dislocate your elbow,shatter your femur, and move on without having noticed you.

    Capricorn
    When all's said and done, it's our experiences that make us who we are. However, that doesn't explain why you're assistant manager of the produce department.

    Aquarius
    There are some kinds of pain that never go away, but after all these years you'd think they'd come up with a way to get that lobster to let go of your nose.

    Pisces
    You will never be able to explain to anyone's satisfaction how all those chickens could just appear out of nowhere.
     
  8. EatMeReturns

    EatMeReturns Happy Mapper Moderator

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    Why is Libra so accurate?
     
  9. Fenix

    Fenix Moderator

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    Dunno. You are Libra then?
     
  10. Kaaraa

    Kaaraa Space Junkie

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    I can never remember whether I should be following the sidereal or tropical zodiac.
     
  11. Meee

    Meee New Member

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    wut
     
  12. ijffdrie

    ijffdrie Lord of Spam

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    since I don't live in the tropes and made the list, probably the sidereal
     
  13. Fenix

    Fenix Moderator

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    Did someone say... tropes?
     
  14. Meee

    Meee New Member

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    Oh no you didn't